Chrissy included birth data for herself (chart) and her Pisces guy (chart) and writes,
Opposites attract, as they say ... but they also drive each other nuts. Virgo's all about the details, whereas Pisces can't find his keys. They both share an orientation towards service. Helping others is their meeting place, and they make a great team, for Pisces provides compassion while Virgo does the case management.

But there's way more than Sun sign compatibility to this relationship. Pisces does need time alone, as this sensitive sign gets overstimulated easily. However, your Pisces guy needs to feel independent for other reasons, and this impulse may be driving his absences. Both his love planets -- Mars and Venus -- are in "I want it NOW" Aries, making a 120-degree angle ("trine") to his Moon, Jupiter and Uranus in fiery Sagittarius. His Moon (needs) requires lots o' space, and Jupiter and Uranus are the two most excitable and adventurous planets in the solar system. He may be a peaceable Pisces, but he's also a very restless soul who needs inspiring experiences to feed his soul.

Meanwhile, you have your Moon and Ascendant in controlling/possessive Scorpio, and Sun and Venus in risk-averse Virgo. These "yin" signs are not an ideal match for his Fire. He may feel held back by you, hence his apparent frustration. But I wonder if (on some level) you want a guy who's occasionally missing? Your Mars-Uranus conjunction can correspond with a young man (Mars) who is distant/unpredictable (Uranus).

There are two ways to go with this: either stop trying to control him (so that he doesn't feel he needs his space so much) or tell him it's unacceptable to not date you on a frequent and predictable basis. The latter option is called "stating your needs." His Fire planets could tell you you're making too many demands on him, in which case he might split entirely. Or his Pisces Sun -- which needs to be pinned down once in a while, because Water needs form -- may fall into line with your expectations.

Comment below: What do you think Chrissy needs to do with her Pisces guy?

Labels: pisces, virgo

Katherine writes,

This Virgo man is my next door neighbor and a very good friend. I see him almost daily, as our group of friends is very close. We've known each other since July and have had an instant connection. Whenever we're in a room it's like a magnet is pulling us together. We've gone on several "dates" and spend a lot of alone time together, but never even kissed (lots of cuddling, though) until recently when I approached him about the situation. We admitted our attraction to each other, but couldn't come up with a solution. I basically told him I would like to give "us" a shot, but no decision was made. On my way out the door, I went for it and kissed him. It was the hottest kiss I've ever had. He retreated for a couple of days after that, which I'm used to because he tends to do that when things get too close between us, but then he bought me a vintage dress for my birthday. Now things are back to where they were; we flirt and touch, but don't kiss, he cooks me lunch, we go dancing, and we don't talk about the situation at all. What is he doing? I want things to happen now, but I know that isn't the Virgo's nature. Do you have any insight or advice? Is this a lost cause?

Your Virgo friend (view his chart) is about as "yin" as one can get. All of his personal planets are in Earth or Water signs, suggesting he's both introverted and fairly cautious. His Taurus Moon takes things slow, and its conjunction to Chiron may relate to a core emotional wound around sensuality or security issues. His Mars -- planet of assertion -- is in indirect and self-protective Cancer. And he has a stellium in Virgo, including Mercury, Venus and an exact Saturn-Sun conjunction. He may be very inhibited and controlled. But with an exact Venus-Mars sextile, he does have an undeniable erotic allure!

You resonate with him (view your chart), as you have your Moon in Virgo and Venus in Taurus. However, with Mercury, Sun and Mars in Aries, you're pretty assertive about expressing your desires. (Otherwise, possibly nothing would ever happen between the two of you!)

Saturn in Virgo is transiting your Moon until the end of June. Your Moon is the only planet in your Seventh House of Partnership, so this transit may correlate with a feeling that your relationship needs are not getting met. Remember, Saturn is the planet of delay and restriction. It's unlikely that any movement is going to happen until the weight of Saturn lifts.

On July 16, transiting Venus enters your Seventh House (depending on the accuracy of your birth time) and transiting Mars exactly trines your natal Venus. Mars will also be energizing his North Node at this time, potentially activating a feeling of having a fated connection. This sounds like a good time to ignite a romance. I know that as an Aries you "want things to happen now," but I suggest you keep dating, and don't push for more until this summer.

Labels: aries, virgo

Autumn provide a birth time (click chart to view) and writes,

I was dating a Capricorn "man" about a year and a half my junior for nearly six months when a Leo man (birthday 19 August) I had been interested in for four years began to return my affections. He did so by sending me elaborate messages, letters, and cards explaining his love for me and how it "killed" him to see me with the Capricorn, a very close friend of his. Although it was frightening, I was sort-of “amoured” by his extravagant expressions and I ended up cheating on my boyfriend with him -- nothing more than kissing -- but it was more an affair of the heart.

The Capricorn boyfriend actually witnessed a kiss, but immediately forgave me and told me he loved me and would like to continue the relationship, if I was willing. We dated for a month or so longer, and I broke up with him for the intellectual, enthralling Leo.

The relationship with the Leo began to slowly wither, but occasionally it would spark up again, but he forbade me to tell the Capricorn because they were both good friends. Eventually and inevitably, he found out. Leo immediately stopped calling, stopped message, and completely avoided me. He told me he wanted to break up temporarily, yet still tried to kiss me and always said things such as, "I love you and I want to be with you again" when we departed.

A shocking "back-story" however: The Leo man was "in love" to the point of obsession with the Capricorn for nearly two years. He is a somewhat closeted bisexual, but I feel he prefers males. The Capricorn has "made-out" with the former, but claims that was a youthful mistake and that he is straight.

I regret hurting my beloved Capricorn, with whom I've had a captivating, amazing sex life with and who has always been kind to me and proven that he would be an amazing long-term boyfriend.

I would like to date him again, and he has informed me that he still wants to be with me... he just does not want to date right now. His attitude towards me has understandably changed.

Although the Leo is still claiming he loves me, I have recently, nearly broken off communications with him.

Do you have any advice on how to win back the Capricorn's heart and prove to him that I will be faithful?

Based on our charts, is it even wise to pursue a relationship with him?

Your Capricorn ex has Venus in Scorpio conjunct Pluto. (View his noon time chart to the right.) His love planet is in a possessive, jealous sign and is intensified by the planet of power, control and transformation. In other words, your Cap loves intensely and with his whole being. When his heart is broken, his pain can be profound. It is a testament of his love that he was able to forgive you so easily for kissing the Leo. Perhaps his Mars in Sag understood the nature of sexual wandering.

One of the challenges being in relationship with him is that your Uranus is exactly conjunct his Sun. You may be a constant source of disruption and instability for him. Not an easy experience for a Capricorn, but as his Sun is widely conjunct Uranus in his own chart, he is learning how to integrate a spirit of revolution in his self-expression.

The fact that he still wants to be with you -- some Capricorns never come back to their exes -- is good news. But you may just have to be patient. Capricorns take their time, as they are naturally cautious. And from what you've written, I see no reason why I should tell you whether it's wise to be with him. You obviously love him -- you were just caught off-guard by the extravagant courting of a Leo man. Your Capricorn may not be flashy, but he's got substance and will likely be with you for the long haul once he's ready to take you back.

Labels: capricorn, leo, virgo

Jillian provided a birth time (click chart to view) and writes,

I fell for a younger scorpio man. He is 31 so I guess it is ok. I assisted and helped him while he went through losing his home, car, and money. I eventually came to feeling like I am in love with him. The problem is he has not made any kind of move towards me. We see each other almost every day, he is very sweet and shows he cares but not in a physical way. There is a lot of sexual tension for me and I can feel it from him. I am crazy over him but have not a clue if he is interested in me for more than friendship.

Your Sixth House Pisces Moon indicates that you are both compassionate and helpful. You need to be of service, and it hurts you to see people or animals in need. It is in a comfortable sextile (60-degree angle) with your Eight House Mars in Taurus, which shows its sexual attraction through tangible actions. (Mars is also symbolic of a younger man, and is in the House naturally associated with Scorpio).

Your Moon is quincunx (150-degree angle) your proud Mercury in Leo. Perhaps you love to be of service (especially with a Virgo Sun), but don't want to feel like a fool. And in some respects, you expect to be appreciated for your benevolence.

Your secondary progressed Mercury and Neptune are currently conjunct -- they were exact on December 2 of last year -- but your planet of thought is still within orb of the planet of delusion.

You're going on fifty, and although I would not say that an 18-year age difference is a deal breaker for a relationship, I think you're just being a sucker. I can't say for sure if he's taken you for a ride, because for all I know he just had a stroke of bad luck and was grateful for your assistance. But perhaps he feels bound to you in some way, so he maintains contact while not being interested in a sexual/romantic relationship.

Saturn is currently transiting your Sun-Pluto conjunction in Virgo. Saturn can bring out the negative in Pluto, which regular readers will know can be about manipulation. View this experience as a test, designed by Saturn, to force you to confront your own issues around use of power. Was a part of you hoping that, by helping this young man out, you would be in a position to dominate him, and that he would have to repay you sexually?

Labels: scorpio, virgo

Someone provided an exact birth time (click chart to view) and writes,

I'm virgo with rising in gemini and moon in leo. Seems complicated right? I just want to know if I will always have problems with relationships or if you have any advice for me. I think I think too much... :( But then I feel too much too so it's like if several people were fighting inside of me constantly to know what to do and what's right or not!!! I love my boyfriend a lot, a gemini but we are four people in our relationship, when both of us are well is like heaven, when both of us are bad it is like hell. When one is well and the other bad we can fix it. But then when we are bad he turns cold and I suffer a lot because believe it or not I hate coldness and I can never be cold. Even when I feel bad I'm never cold. I just don't know what to do. He is cold right now and he treats me as if he was two different people, when he is there he shows he loves me and treats me as if I was a princess when he is not there and he is cold it is like if I was a fly in his life. Can you tell me something about this? Thank you very much.

Gemini is the sign of the Twins. Mutable signs have a sense of duality (the two fish of Pisces; the half-man, half-beast of Sagittarius; the sacred and mundane aspects of Virgo) but Gemini's duality is the most pronounced. A Gemini can have multiple agendas which do not necessarily go in the same direction, and which can lead to great conflict. Gemini is into you one day, the next day he's not. It's difficult for this sign to stay consistently attached to one person. His other half' will want the freedom to be somewhere else.

You, as a Virgo, are more consistent because you are an earth sign. You think too much because both your Gemini Ascendant and Virgo Sun are ruled by mental Mercury. It's hard for you not to be analytical, with Mercury in Virgo. Yet, you can't be cold because both your Moon and Venus are in warm Leo (although their conjunction to natal Saturn can lead you to feel a withdrawal of affection).

Currently, transiting Saturn -- the planet of restriction and hardship -- is conjunct your natal Mercury. Difficulties with communication and negative thoughts are common for this transit. Saturn may be bringing on the freeze in your relationship because your natal Mercury rules your Fifth House of Romance. This house is naturally associated with Leo. When Saturn puts a damper on your love life, your Venus in Leo misses being treated like a princess.

Saturn will be transiting your Mercury until summer of 2008, due to its retrograde motion. You may be feeling weighed down and unable to communicate your needs. Increased self-criticism may become unbearable. You cannot change your boyfriend, but you can use this period to assess which communication patterns work for you, and which do not. As Saturn may bring out the worst in Virgo, consider if your perfectionistic and nitpicky tendencies turn your Gemini boyfriend off. Virgo and Gemini, despite being ruled by the same planet, make a stressful square aspect to each other. The air of Gemini wants to move about, while the earth of Virgo wants to focus on one small detail. Gemini does not have the laser focus of the Virgo mind, and may grow impatient with its obsessive attention to faults. Surely, your Gemini Ascendant increases compatibility with your boyfriend. But for now, let Saturn help you remove the wheat from the chaff in your field of talk.

Comment below to leave Someone feedback, or discuss Gemini-Virgo compatibility in the forum.

Labels: astrology, gemini, virgo

You know how excessive criticism from a partner makes you doubt that he loves you? Well, the opposite can run true if you're with a Virgo. If he stops picking you apart, he doesn't care enough to make you his improvement project. A Virgo dissects things in a quest to make them function more efficiently, and if he isn't bothering to make you the best-running model he can ... well, prepare for your pink slip.

On the other side of the spectrum, he may nitpick such minor details -- that he had glossed over before because he was willing to live with a few of your flaws -- that you feel every ounce of your being is under the microscope. It's one thing to be told that a hair is out of place ... it's another to hear that the mole on your chin should be removed. When Virgo harps on aspects of yourself that cannot be changed without the help of surgery or a Scientology audit, you know he's lost all affection for you.

Labels: astrology, virgo

If your Virgo drags you to a book-signing and you flirt with the author, what reaction will you elicit in your boyfriend?

Fellow Earth sign Taurus is possessive because he thinks he owns you. Scorpio acts this way because he doesn't trust you. But Virgo? He's more likely to feel self-critical. "What's wrong with me? Maybe I'm not nerd-chic enough for her, so she makes eyes at the published author. And how come I haven't gotten it together to write a book yet? Maybe I need to work on myself more."

In general, mutable signs (Gemini, Virgo, Sagittarius, Pisces) are so flexible that they neither cling to objects nor people. Gemini needs the variety, Sag loves their freedom, and Pisces loves the whole world! But Virgo's a strange combination: an Earth sign that craves order, but ruled by Mercury. This mental planet lends Virgo an analytic perspective focused on pragmatic (Earth) matters.

If seeing a girlfriend flirt is like seeing someone move his stapler from its ordained position on his desk, anxiety -- not possessiveness -- arises. Not all is right in the world, so he wonders how he can improve the relationship so that she doesn't get chat-happy with another man.

And if he starts picking you apart, it's just him projecting his self-criticism onto you. Sure, he's angry ... but he won't admit it. When he says, "Gosh, you made a fool of yourself talking to someone way out of your league, especially when you confused Derrida with Foucault ..." he'll justify his lashing with the excuse that he's just trying to help you better yourself. See, there's a difference between not wanting to share ... and hating yourself.

Labels: astrology, virgo

Jara aka BlahBlah writes for 'Seduction Central' on Saturdays. (Thanks, Jeff!)

Disclaimer: This blog entry is for humorous and educational purposes only. Adhere to the following advice at your own risk.

If you've ever been in a relationship with a tender Taurus, virtuous Virgo, or a committed Capricorn, then you know how it feels to be with a partner who wants to be your biggest asset. But what happens when your earth sign mate has become a liability? Here's how to make a clean break with a Taurus, Virgo, or Capricorn:

The Breakup Strategy

Taurus doesn't like change – even if the change is for the better. This quality is what makes breaking up with Taurus challenging, especially for signs that don't like change anymore than Taurus does (that means you, Cancer) or who would prefer that a problem solve itself (yes, I’m talking to you, Pisces). You want the quickest way to break up with Taurus? It doesn’t exist. When you entered into a relationship with Taurus, you made an agreement to be in it for the long haul and you must honor that agreement. This includes enduring a long breakup. Begin by weaning Taurus out of your relationship by failing to cater to the Bull. Stop cooking all those great meals. Don't run any more bubble baths. No more late night massages! If this doesn’t work, try introducing Taurus to someone who cooks better than you.

Breaking up with Virgo is actually very simple. Virgo is a mutable sign, which means that the Virgin easily adapts to new stimuli. In this case, the new stimuli would be you wanting to break up. Expect many questions about how you came to your decision. Although the chain of questions will seem endless, it’s just Virgo's way of gathering more information for future reference. Not answering the questions only inspires more questions, so carve out some time to satiate Virgo's curiosity and you’ll be home free!

Capricorns are usually the ones doing the dumping, so breaking up with them is relatively easy – as long as you let them be the boss of the breakup. Present yourself as a loser without future earning potential or any interest in money or status what-so-ever. No matter how many times the Goat introduces you to a great mentor in your career field, say you're not sure this is the right step for you. The Capricorn will fire you from the relationship for being an unsuitable mate (aka business partner). If you don’t let Capricorn dump you, then look forward to changing jobs, bank accounts, and social security #s in order to protect yourself from the Capricorn wanting to get revenge against you (especially if your goat has Venus in Scorpio).

Ex-files

Unless you broke Taurus' trust, a Taurus ex will probably be in your life forever in some way or another (especially if you have kids together). If you married Taurus without a prenuptial agreement (how'd you manage that?), then be prepared for a long battle in court if you want to leave the marriage with anything Taurus wants to keep, like the car, the house, the kids, or YOU. If you're moving out of the home you’ve built with the Bull, make sure to clearly mark all of your belongings. It will make packing so much easier.

You will enjoy Virgo better after a breakup than you did during the relationship. Not only do you still get the constructive "advice," but Virgo might even help you reorganize your life after it falls apart due to Virgo's highly noticeable absence. If you share children with Virgo, you won't have to fight for joint custody, but you will have to endure Virgo frequently correcting and criticizing your parenting style.

The great thing about a Capricorn ex is that the Goat won’t kiss and tell about your breakup. It will be as if you never existed at all…

How did your relationship with a Taurus, Virgo or Capricorn end? Did the end of your relationship with an earth sign leave you feeling on shaky footing or on solid ground?

Labels: astrology, capricorn, taurus, virgo

In a man's chart, Venus represents the type of (young) woman to whom he is attracted. The mythological Venus is Aphrodite, the goddess of love and beauty. The planetary Venus does not travel beyond two zodiac signs from one's Sun, meaning that a man with Venus in Cancer can only be a Taurus, Gemini, Cancer, Leo or Virgo.

In general, this man will be drawn to a maternal type, a woman who will nurture him with her cooking or with her sensitive attendance to his emotional needs. The Cancer figure tends to be on the shapely side -- think of the stereotypical mother's warm bosom.

A Cancer man will obviously be the most straightforward to please in this manner, as his Venus seeks similar expression to his Sun. However, when a man's Sun sign is different than his Venus sign, attraction gets more complicated.

A Leo man likes glitz and glamour, and his attraction to a shy, empathic cuddle bunny may be at odds with his desire to be seen in public with a trophy wife who serves as an accessory to boost his image. To attract this type of man, one would need to encase the caretaker in a slinky dress -- to be the wild Moon to his Sun.

A Virgo man may be more comfortable with his Venus in Cancer, as both signs are on the introverted side. However, his critical tendencies and analytical mindframe are not at home in the world of emotions. He may project his Venus onto a woman (meaning that he disowns his Venus and makes a woman "take the Cancer on" for him) and then end up hurting her feelings by picking her apart. To attract this type of man, one would need to have enough self-confidence to not take his feedback personally, yet be receptive to his home cooking reviews ... if they have any merit.

A Gemini man may have a hard time incorporating his Venus in Cancer because his propensity towards variety and exploration threatens the part of him that craves emotional security. He consciously wants to play the field, yet he's drawn to a woman who wants him to stay at home with her to watch the Lifetime channel. To attract this type of man, one needs to be able to be caring without being smothering, and to provide a home base without insisting that he's home all the time.

A Taurus man may have the easiest time with his Venus in Cancer (other than the Cancer man). Both Taurus and Cancer crave security and safety. Taurus grooves on being fed and nurtured. He may not be as emotional as the woman to whom he is attracted, but if she can translate her love into sensual acts and the creation of home-made knick knacks, she's sure to have his heart.

Labels: astrology, cancer, gemini, leo, taurus, venus, virgo

withhope provided a birth time (click chart to view) and writes,

My boyfriend and I have been together for three years. He recently broke up with me and told me he no longer has feelings for me. He has said this in the past when he gets upset at me. I'm lost without him. He had lied to me about somethings in the past and in time I built up resentment and the last two days it all came out. I said somethings to him that I'm not proud of. I didn't mean any of it as I was speaking from being hurt. He has never cheated, but he did lie and that lie devastated me. He is a Scorpio. He has said he doesn't even want to talk to me anymore. Will this pass and will he ever come back to me? I've been faithful and honest to him for three years. I've stood by him and always showed respect. I'm heart broken)>: Should I stop trying to email him and call him? Please tell me what to do.
Much love!

The buildup of resentment is a Scorpio/8th House/Pluto matter. Its expression is Martian. You may have particular difficulty expressing your anger because your Sagittarian Mars is squared by a tight Sun-Pluto conjunction in Virgo. Although your Mars just wants to let the anger out, your Sun-Pluto is tightly controlled. Pluto brings a concentrated force to your self-expression, and in Virgo, these two planets can be intensely self-critical, and are much more reserved than your Mars. As a result of this conflict in expression of your planets, you may have a tendency to hold on to underground anger until a trigger leads to an explosion.

In your case, the volcano has been active for a while, and it just erupted. Transiting Pluto has been moving through your 12th House of Deception, Lies and Hidden Things, revealing information about your Scorpio man, as well as intensifying your anger, as transiting Pluto is conjunct your natal Mars. Transiting Saturn has been moving through your 8th House of Intimacy and Ugly Feelings Aroused in Relationships, and it is trine (180-degree angle) your natal Mars, bringing some concreteness to its expression. Finally, a Leo New Moon this past Sunday fell in your 8th House, stimulating your brewing resentment.

Note also (and this applies to everyone) that retrograde Venus is conjunct Saturn. It's a hard time for relationships in general. Old stuff comes up, and some of it is unpleasant to confront.

I don't know if your Scorpio will come back. Scorpios do tend to cut people out of their lives, but there are always exceptions. Transiting Mercury (which happens to rule your 7th House of Partnership) will conjoin retrograde Venus this Friday (8/17), a good time to talk about relationship matters. Venus then goes direct on September 8, a time when love lives can move forward. I'd suggest you not overwhelm him with calls and emails, but to just pop him a note this Friday and on the 8th of next month, and see how he responds.

Comment below to provide withhope feedback, or discuss Virgo-Scorpio compatibility in the forum

Labels: astrology, breakups, scorpio, virgo

of the female virgo sign and her sexual parts free info

-- an MSN search query used to find this blog

I don't think the Virgo female's sexual parts work differently than those of females born under the other Sun signs. Her experience of her sexual parts may be different than that of other women, so perhaps that is what the querent was getting at.

Regardless of astrological influences, don't we all share pretty much the same biology (along gender lines)? A yoni is a yoni, after all. I don't think the zodiac cares all that much about physical stimulation of the nether regions. However, astrology may have something to say about a woman's relation to her private parts: how comfortable she feels receiving pleasure, letting go of inhibition, being with her body. I actually covered this somewhat in Will a Virgo female get dirty in bed?

How do you think your planetary placements relate to the manner in which you experience sexual pleasure?

Labels: astrology, virgo

As a Pisces, I deal with grief and pain by drinking large quantities of alcohol and watching DVDs. (Just kidding on the first part!) Virgo, my opposite, scrubs his toilet when his heart breaks. Unlike Pisces -- who seeks to escape suffering by transcending reality -- Virgo hones in on the details, immersing himself in ritualistic behaviors. A thorough house-cleaning may help him purge the demons of longing. Or he may participate in a round of colonic hydrotherapy sessions to cleanse himself of embodied relationship toxins.

Virgo is ruled by intellectual Mercury. This analytic guy likes to improve upon anything that is not working efficiently. Even though the relationship is over, he will obsess over what he could have done better, picking apart the flaws in communication patterns, living arrangements and bookshelf categorization systems.

If there is a liability in Virgo's coping mechanisms, it is that he will process the breakup mentally, yet not truly feel his grief. As a result, he may somatize his sadness, and end up consulting his holistic health practitioner to address problems that would not exist if he truly stayed with his emotions.

Labels: astrology, breakups, virgo

Ali provided a birth time (click chart to view) and wrote,

I am totally in love with a wonderful man who is a Virgo sun and Virgo moon and we both have Libra as our venus--i think that means something but I'm not entirely sure.

I haven't allowed myself to fall deeply in love with anyone for 15 years, ever since a very charming libra broke my heart into little pieces. After a very, very, very, very long and frusturating relationship with an aquarius i decided it was better to risk a broken heart then feel the emptieness of a relationship with no emotional connection. Which brings me to my question.

Six months ago I met and fell totally in love with a wonderful man. My only problem is that I have pangs of fear--fear of suffering a broken heart again, fear of abandonment, etc. This fear issue may be holding back our relationship from progressing to the next stage of commitment. Should I put my trust in him? Is it true that a Virgo man is a safe bet?

Your love planets (Venus and Mars) as well as your Moon are in relationship-oriented Libra, signifying a strong need to connect. However, this Libra stellium also contains Uranus and Pluto. These disruptive outer planets are in many ways beyond your control. Pluto's destructive power may have broken your heart (Venus), while Uranus' unpredictable need for independence may have resulted in your abandonment (Moon). Since these Libra planets are in the Western hemisphere (or right side) of your chart, you may be at the mercy of other people -- that is, you do not feel in control of your destiny.

In some respects, these fears are just something you have to live with. Given the influence of Uranus and Pluto, you are unlikely to have what one would call a "stable" love life, as their purpose is to shake up and knock down anything that gets in their way. At best, you can consciously explore the depths of intimacy (Pluto-Venus) and embrace your impulsive need for freedom (Moon-Uranus-Mars). You won't get over your fear until you accept and embrace your life-long transformational journey in the realm of partnership.

Virgo men are safe bets as far as men go, but your boyfriend's Sun sign means nothing until you are willing to look your terror in the eye.

Comment below to provide Ali feedback, or discuss Virgo-Scorpio compatibility in the forum.

Related post: Is Scorpio man cheating on Virgo woman?

Labels: astrology, libra, pluto, scorpio, uranus, virgo

Such a Virgo provided a birth time (click chart to view) and writes,

Ok, I have been involved very deeply with a pisces male four years my junior for exactly eleven months. He has a girlfriend (I think she's a Taurus), he's been with her since before he and I got together. She lives in another state and depending on how well they are getting along, she visits him anywhere from 2-4 times a month (although she never stays for longer than two days). When she visits he's with me until the minute that she gets here and he makes plans to be with me even before she leaves. The two of them argue because she can tell that he doesn't want her to come, but he won't tell her not to. Not only do he and I work together but we honestly spend all of our free time (when she's not here) with each other. We go on vacations together very often, (we actually have two really amazing ones that are in the works for December of this year and March of next year), and we share the same social circle. I could write a book about he and I, but basically my question is this: I've never been so in love, because of the depth of my feelings for him I am now so much more open to the possibilities of love and life. I've tried to leave him alone because he hasn't left her and gives me no indication that he will. But whenever I leave him, both he and I are miserable. The little that I know of his and her relationship doesn't seem like a happy one, but they are both signs that almost never give up, even when unhappy. What should I do? My heart says to stay and continue to be the light of his life (I know that I am and this has been confirmed by both his family and friends), but my mind says that he'll never leave her as long as he has me to run to. I think that what they once shared has faded but that it will take them both a while to admit it. Like I said, I could write a book, but based on what you've just read, what do you think?

You have a North Node/Sun/Venus/Saturn stellium in Virgo in your Second House of Self-Worth. Venus -- the love planet -- is in its "fall" in Virgo, which basically means that your romantic and sensual needs are not easily met, as they are expressed in a critical, analytical manner. (The opposite of Venus' fall is its "exaltation" in romantic, divinity-seeking Pisces.) In addition, your Venus is conjunct Saturn, a pairing that can leave you feeling deprived of love. (See my post on Saturn and Venus.)

The way I see it, you can either stay or leave. If you stay, you are accepting this arrangement as is. Yet if you were totally cool with it, you would not be writing me.

If you leave, it would for strategic reasons -- with a desired outcome of making him see the light so that he breaks up with his long-distance girlfriend and comes back to you, 100% available.

If you make an ultimatum -- "You have to choose between her and me" -- you may risk losing him.

I could get all karmic on you and ask if you unconsciously sought this type of relationship to confirm your view that you are not going to get what you want. But I won't. You're here now, and you want a solution. Unfortunately, there are no easy answers -- just put up with it, or leave. (If there's an alternative I've missed, my readers will tell me!)

Fortunately, you're getting a planetary kick in the pants. Transiting Uranus in Pisces in your Eighth House of Sexual Intimacy is currently opposing your Venus-Saturn conjunction. Something's gotta change, and perhaps you are writing me because you feel the stirrings. You are sick of the status quo. How your love life will shake up, I don't know ... but it will. And if you don't take the reigns of revolution into your own hands, Uranus' unique brand of shock therapy will come from outside.

Comment below: What do you think Such a Virgo should do?

Discuss Virgo-Pisces compatibility in the forum.

Labels: astrology, pisces, virgo

What kind of responsiveness does a Virgo woman want from any man? She'd want her guy to both notice the effort she puts into making the home organized and clean, and to help out in the maintenance of that level of orderliness. On a more personal level -- despite her modesty -- she may want to be valued for the attention she gives to her appearance, as well as the behind-the-scenes work she does to make everything run smoothly.

A Capricorn man is not likely to "tune out" at home like a Pisces, but he may -- after a long day at work -- sit on the couch and read the Wall Street Journal instead of attend to dust bunnies. He wants order like Virgo, but on a higher level -- the structure of organizations, rather than the structure of the shoe closet.

In his quest to increase his status in the world, he may not be so concerned with the details of mundane life, except to the extent that they help facilitate his ascent. He will, however, take pride in providing security to his partner, and as a Virgo woman can sometimes be a little O.C. (that's obsessive-compulsive, not Orange County), his Capricornian consistency can help reduce her worries.

How to get the Capricorn man to be more responsive: Suggest he host a business-related cocktail mixer at your home. It would have to be on a weekend, so that he can help participate in the preparation: helping you clean, giving you feedback on your attire -- he will, after all, be invested in having everything "look good." In addition, he won't be able to take for granted the work that goes into such a production.

Comment below with your ideas, or contribute to the Virgo-Capricorn compatibility discussion in the forum.

Labels: astrology, capricorn, virgo

Nestle asks,

Who is more compatible with a Sagittarian Woman - an Aries man or a Virgo man? I have been involved with the Virgo for about 7 years off and on; I recently met the Aries (about 2 years ago) but feel more in sync with the Aries. Is this possible?

Yes, it's quite possible. Both Sagittarius and Aries are fire signs, which make a 120-degree angle (or "trine") to each other in the zodiac. Fire signs are inspirational and spontaneous. Aries tends to be more pioneering than Sag, who spends more time in her head than in the world of action. Your sign is ruled by Jupiter, planet of philosophy and international travel -- expansion of mind and body. Aries is ruled by Mars, the warrior planet, who wants what he wants now, and is willing to do whatever it takes to get it, regardless of how his actions impact others. Sag is more concerned with morals, with right and wrong, whereas Aries just plows ahead, regardless. But you both have spirit, and have a similar outgoing nature.

Virgo, on the other hand, is a pragmatic earth sign, and makes a 90-degree angle (or "square") to Sagittarius. As far as Sun sign compatibility goes, this is a stressful match. Virgo is careful and concerned with fine details, while you are adventurous and look at the big picture. Virgo's ruling planet is Mercury, the communicator, more interested in facts than ideas (Jupiter's domain). Virgo dips his toe into the water to make sure it's the right temperature; you dive right in.

Discuss Aries-Sagittarius compatibility or Virgo-Sagittarius compatibility in the forums, or just comment below.

Labels: aries, astrology, sagittarius, virgo

Lucy in the sky with diamonds provided a birth time (click chart to view) and writes,

im a female interested in a male virgo...what do you think?

A Sag and a Virgo are usually not the best match. Sag is an adventurous, spontaneous fire sign. Virgo is a cautious, modest earth sign. The first likes the big picture, the latter appreciates the finest details. These two signs make an aspect called a square to each other, which means they function at cross-purposes. The one thing they do have in common is mutability, which means that they are each flexible in their own way.

Virgo would be a good fit for you, though, because you have Pisces Rising. Your persona, or how you interact with the world, can be characterized as compassionate and sensitive. At the opposite end of your chart -- where you find your partner -- sits Virgo. You are drawn to a man who is focused on service and function, someone who can take care of the mundane aspects of existence so that you can live in your imagination (Pisces) and explore the possibilities of life (Sagittarius). In addition, your South Node -- which signifies where you're coming from, karmically -- is in Virgo, so he may feel familiar to you (perhaps in a past life?).

Jeffrey offers private consultations.

Labels: astrology, sagittarius, virgo

Demetria provided a birth time (click chart to view) and writes,

I have been in a relationship with a scorpio male for a yr. he cheated on me with a libra female 3 months into the relationship because he said I was yelling too much and smoking. He lied to me constantly about EVERYTHING. He swore he was in love with me and I was his dream girl but still cheated. She eventually dumped him and we got back together. (i eventually stopped the things he didnt like) he now swears he loves me, realizes he screwed up and wants to marry me. Is he really in love with me now or did he just come back by default?

Around April 2006, transiting Uranus -- the planet of unpredictability and independence -- entered your Seventh House of Partnership, which would have coincided with the beginning of your relationship with this Scorpio man. When Uranus enters this house, your partnership(s) are shaken up ... you experience an awakening in how you relate to significant others.

After its retrograde period -- when Uranus apparently moved backwards into your Sixth House -- this revolutionary planet re-entered your Seventh House around February of this year. Now the real work begins, and there is more change on the horizon. Uranus is approaching an opposition to your Virgo Sun, which rules your Twelfth House of secret love affairs. During this life-changing transit, you experience radical breakthroughs, an awakening of your self-expression, and a need to do things your own way, however unconventional. However, this transit is an opposition, with transiting Uranus in your Seventh House. Both the aspect and the house concern relationships, so your love life is the realm through which you will undergo an electric makeover. As such, you may feel that change is being thrust upon you, not that you are a conscious agent of your own revolution of self. And I hate to break it to you ... this transit is going to last a long time. Uranus stations retrograde at 18 Pisces -- one degree from your 19 Virgo Sun -- in June of this year, and passes 19 Pisces for the last time in January 2009.

Given the placement of transiting Uranus, the nature of the opposition aspect, and your Sun's association with hidden things, I would not expect any sense of relationship stability for the next 18 months.

About the lying: Pisces and Neptune are associated with deception. Pisces sits on your Seventh House cusp, and your Sun (men) squares Neptune. Transiting Uranus has also been stimulating your natal Neptune. You may have a pattern of being drawn to men who are deceptive, or at least escapist in nature.

I haven't answered your question. I don't know if he's in love with you. I do have two suggestions:

1. Don't get married until 2009.
2. Use this relationship as a vessel in which you learn -- through the Uranian principle of change -- that you, my dear Virgo, have less control than you think.

Jeffrey offers private consultations.

Labels: astrology, neptune, pisces, scorpio, uranus, virgo

A Virgo female asks:

I have read a lot of different horoscopes about Scorpios and Virgos. Are we really compatible and are these two signs a good love match? Also, my Scorpio man and I have been seeing each other for over a year now. I have revealed to him that I am in love with him. He has told told me that he loves me, but that he is not in love with me, but that he cares for me deeply and that it takes him a while to fall in love. Is this normal for most Scorpios and does it usually take this long for a Scorpio to fall in love? Also, I have no proof but at times I feel that my Scorpio may be involved with other women and I know that Scorpio's are very sexual and lustful. Is it possible that my Scorpio man is telling me the truth that he does care for me deeply, but that due to his lustful nature he can still juggle other women, while having deep feelings for me? I have asked him in the past if he is involved with anyone else and to please be truthful with me. He always replies that I worry too much and that he is not seeing other people. However, my gut instinct and intuition makes me feel that he is. Should I take it that if I do feel that something is going on that it probably is and that he is being dishonest with me? If so, does that mean that he does not care deeply for me as he claims? Do you think that there is a chance for a Scorpio and Virgo to have a deep love bond, so much so that my Scorpio man will give up all other women and fall in love with me? Please help. Virgo girl not sure what to do.

"He has told told me that he loves me, but that he is not in love with me, but that he cares for me deeply and that it takes him a while to fall in love."

Since you're a Virgo, you will bear with me as I linguistically parse these phrases (with apologies to George Lakoff).

• When he loves you, he is performing an action, because love is being used as a verb. He is willing to care for you.
• When he is in love with you, both of you are in a box, for LOVE IS A CONTAINER.
• When he falls in love, he is not in control. He slips and falls into the "love box," against his will.

As we know, Scorpios are control freaks, so it is not so easy for them to allow themselves to do anything against their will, to surrender. For a Scorpio, giving up control opens up the risk of hurt and betrayal, so perhaps it does take him a long time to fall in love.

One way to guard against surrender is by having affairs, for it keeps him at a distance from the love box. However, you may just be a Virgo worrywort. Just because you feel something is going on, does not mean that it is. But you also should trust your gut, especially because Virgo rules this part of the body. You likely have good "attention to detail" (Virgos love to put this on their resume). What would be "out of place" if your Scorpio were cheating on you? Would you notice? I'm not telling you to poke around his private affairs, for that will certainly make a Scorpio run for the hills. But think logically about what would be "out of order." Also keep in mind that Virgos are self-critical. Maybe you don't feel good enough to have a man devote himself wholeheartedly to you.

Virgo and Scorpio are a good match, but this is not what your concern is really about. I'd suggest that you look at your relationship history. Have you been cheated on before? Do you feel worthy of being loved? If after your own self-exploration you still feel in your gut that he is cheating, write back and we'll see what we can do.

Comment below: Well, what do you think?

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Labels: astrology, infidelity, scorpio, virgo

We all know that the prim and proper librarian experiences reckless abandon in bed, throwing off her geek-chic black-rimmed glasses, letting down her long black hair, and ripping open her bodice, buttons flying. (Or is that just my male fantasy?)

Virgo is associated with the myth of Persephone, in which the daughter of the grain goddess Demeter is abducted into the underworld by Hades. In Demeter's grief, she neglects the earth and people starve. Zeus intercedes to bring Persephone back, but Hades slips Persie a bottle of Pom Wonderful, which results in her needing to stay in his realm for four months every year.

The underworld is a kinky place, full of sexual deviants. The Virgo female needs to occasionally get dirty to fulfill her contract. One archetypal expression of Virgo is the Sacred Prostitute, serving the Divine through the sensual arts. The key for the Virgo female is to get down while maintaining her integrity. She can be "pure of spirit" in the bedroom, as long as she does not stray from her center. When winter has overcome its stay and Persie has not returned from Hades' realm, it is time to call the Zeus Recovery Service.

Related post: Perspephone was not abducted!

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Labels: astrology, virgo

Miss Worried Virgo writes:

OK so its resorted to this. Me Miss Virgo, just recently started dating a Cancer man. We have been long time friends but the romantic connection is so very strong, at least for me anyway. Talk about romance. He knows exactly what to say and do. He broke up with some one about 3 months ago. He went so far as to change his phone numbers and moved and doesnt care that she cant reach him. I knew she hurt him because he would come crying to me to often. Never in a million years did I think we would be dating!!! At times he can get moody and the predictable Virgo that I am cant take those mood swings. This is sort of weird because we were friends first and never in a million years did I think we would be going out on dates. He knew my boyfriend and I knew his girlfriend. I dont want to ruin our friendship by going to the next level in the relationship but he is persistant and I must admit that I am willing. Should I just call it off now to save our friendship? The thought of him being with some one else would kill me however, even though we have never been sexually involved.

Friendships are sacred, but romantic relationships are even more rare. I know you are being cautious, as is Virgo's inclination. However, you only live once. (At least in your current body!)

Virgo-Cancer is a fine combination. You may analyze your feelings more than necessary while he wallows in his moods, but you both share a risk-averse nature that will keep you tied to the work-home routine, without too much disruption.

Be careful, though. Cancer can get defensive, and if he completely shut out his ex to the point of moving and changing his number, what's to say he may not do the same to you if he feels sufficiently wounded? Cancer is ruled by the habitual Moon and serves his past -- he may be a slave to old patterns that are hard to shake. Virgo has been known to nitpick, and the Crab may be too sensitive to bear too much criticism. Harp on him too much, and he'll retreat into his shell. After that, you won't be able to reach him on his cell.

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Labels: astrology, cancer, compatibility, virgo

A Virgo woman asks:

I am a 6 degrees Pisces rising with 13 degrees Virgo sun woman. I have been involved with a 12 degrees Virgo rising with 9 degrees Pisces sun man. What a polarity! He cannot decide between me and his ex, a leo rising scorpio woman. Is the March 3 eclipse going to end it for us once and for all? How can I make sense of this eclipse?

The lunar eclipse (Full Moon) this Saturday -- with the Moon at 13 Virgo -- will conjoin your Sun in your 7th House of Partnership, as well as his Ascendant (1st House of Self). Uranus -- the planet of unpredictability and independence -- and the Sun are currently in your 1st House and will be in his 7th House.

Let's look at you, first. Uranus is opposing your Sun, which can signify the man in your life. You need to experience a revolution -- a change in the status quo -- with regards to how your own needs (1st House) relate to your partner's (7th House Sun). Oppositions (180-degree angle) are make-or-break aspects. There is a sense of culmination. Either there will be a radical restructuring of your relationship, or you two will separate. He can't stay on the fence much longer. That's the Uranus part. The