Relationship Astrology: What Planet Rules Your Romance?
The following guest post is by Beth Turnage.
Relationships. We dream of them, long for them, dish about them. They are the spice of life and the burr under our saddles. Nothing feels as wonderful or awful as our romantic entanglements. Yet as consuming as the pursuit of our heart's desires, many times we are often at odds with what we think a relationship should be and what we end up with. Why does this happen?
We yearn to "fall in love," discover that magical sustaining relationship that will provide us with love and emotional security. But relationships, as we know, are far more complex than that. This is because the moment of your birth describes the conditions of your lifetime. Your natal chart reflects your innate talents, abilities and desires. Within the complexities of your birth chart are your capacity to give and receive love and build relationships. The person you have a romance with is a reflection of that. Relationships are the mirror of our soul.
We all come here with specific lessons to learn or events to experience. The planets as they travel in the sky -- what astrologers call "transits" -- trigger the start and time span of those lessons. It is how astrologers can predict when certain things are likely to happen.
Now we all have heard that men are from Mars and women are from Venus, but it's the heavy hitters of the solar system that puts the spins on our entanglements. Here's a run down of how the major players play out.
Jupiter, the beneficent fatso, often brings on romance hot and heavy, with lots of sex and the consequences thereof. Jupiter rules the freewheeling sign of Sagittarius, which loves to love 'em and leave 'em. If Jupiter is prominent in your chart or if Sagittarius is predominant in your chart, you find it hard to settle down. Often you have many relationships, sometimes at the same time. You are excited by each romantic discovery, then tire of it when something substantial is required of you. As with anything dealing with the planet of luck, you are likely to get more than you bargain for when you get lucky. Transits of Jupiter in the Fifth House can bring a pregnancy, the Seventh a marriage because of pregnancy. Jupiterian relationships are often filled with fun, but need some kind of stabilizing influence from Saturn for them to last.
Saturn, the planet of work and responsibility, seems like an unlikely player in the field of romance. If Saturn is in your Seventh House of Relationships or if you have a significant portion of planets in your natal chart in the sign of Capricorn, you have two responses to relationships. Either you are very stable and committed, willing to do the work to keep the relationship going for the long haul, or you have been so frustrated with relationships in the past that you avoid meaningful ones altogether. You pass through a series of liaisons that fill your physical needs but not your emotional ones. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, for all the glamour of their stardom, have a Saturnian romance. Her Venus/Saturn combination is opposite his stellium of Capricorn planets. Though one or both may chaff under the responsibilities of sustaining this relationship, theirs is a difficult tie to break. When Saturn transits the Seventh House of Relationships, you are likely to marry, though not without considerable pre-wedding jitters.
Uranus, the planet of the unexpected, brings relationships out of the blue. If you have a strength Eleventh House or Uranian influence in your chart, you are more susceptible to the charms of these couplings. Exciting and enticing, these liaisons are the ones that make our hearts pound and have us considering formerly unimaginable actions. Your love interest may be unusual, foreign or just plain whacked. Since Uranus is the planet of individuality, these types of relationships have more to do with discovering something about ourselves than hearts and flowers. Though intense, an Uranian relationship rarely lasts past the transit to the planet it triggers. Remember that ... when Uranus makes an impact on your chart and you consider doing things that will blow your life apart.
Neptune is your hearts and flowers romance. Your lover is wonderful, without a flaw. You are so enamored of your heart's desire you barely notice that your lover doesn't notice you. In this relationship, there is an element of deception. Either you are not seeing your lover clearly or your lover is lying to you about something important ... like the fact that your lover is married! If you are a Pisces or have a strong Twelfth House, you are susceptible to Neptunian charms. When you realize that your sweetie has warts, either you act in a mature manner and accept them or you run screaming for the hills.
Pluto is another unlikely candidate in the romance department, but for many people it is a potent force. People with a heavy Scorpio or Eighth House emphasis in their chart often wind up in these types of relationships, though Pluto's transit to your Sun, Moon or Venus can offer up this enticement to you. With Pluto, you are inexplicably drawn to a relationship. The feelings are intense to the point of being overwhelming. You are convinced you have found your one true love and that you are destined to be together forever. The ugly side of this affair is that this type is often about power and control. Plutonian relationships can last up to four years, as the Pluto transits moves off the the trigger planet. If dancing with danger is not your cup of tea, run -- don't walk -- to the nearest exit to avoid the fire! One day, you'll be glad you did.
About the Author
Beth Turnage is a professional astrologer who has twenty years experience counseling clients in career and relationship issues. Currently she writes an astrology column for a weekly newspaper on the Connecticut shoreline and an astrology blog at 451 Press. You can check out the blog at www.astrologyexplored.com.
Relationships. We dream of them, long for them, dish about them. They are the spice of life and the burr under our saddles. Nothing feels as wonderful or awful as our romantic entanglements. Yet as consuming as the pursuit of our heart's desires, many times we are often at odds with what we think a relationship should be and what we end up with. Why does this happen?
We yearn to "fall in love," discover that magical sustaining relationship that will provide us with love and emotional security. But relationships, as we know, are far more complex than that. This is because the moment of your birth describes the conditions of your lifetime. Your natal chart reflects your innate talents, abilities and desires. Within the complexities of your birth chart are your capacity to give and receive love and build relationships. The person you have a romance with is a reflection of that. Relationships are the mirror of our soul.
We all come here with specific lessons to learn or events to experience. The planets as they travel in the sky -- what astrologers call "transits" -- trigger the start and time span of those lessons. It is how astrologers can predict when certain things are likely to happen.
Now we all have heard that men are from Mars and women are from Venus, but it's the heavy hitters of the solar system that puts the spins on our entanglements. Here's a run down of how the major players play out.
Jupiter, the beneficent fatso, often brings on romance hot and heavy, with lots of sex and the consequences thereof. Jupiter rules the freewheeling sign of Sagittarius, which loves to love 'em and leave 'em. If Jupiter is prominent in your chart or if Sagittarius is predominant in your chart, you find it hard to settle down. Often you have many relationships, sometimes at the same time. You are excited by each romantic discovery, then tire of it when something substantial is required of you. As with anything dealing with the planet of luck, you are likely to get more than you bargain for when you get lucky. Transits of Jupiter in the Fifth House can bring a pregnancy, the Seventh a marriage because of pregnancy. Jupiterian relationships are often filled with fun, but need some kind of stabilizing influence from Saturn for them to last.
Saturn, the planet of work and responsibility, seems like an unlikely player in the field of romance. If Saturn is in your Seventh House of Relationships or if you have a significant portion of planets in your natal chart in the sign of Capricorn, you have two responses to relationships. Either you are very stable and committed, willing to do the work to keep the relationship going for the long haul, or you have been so frustrated with relationships in the past that you avoid meaningful ones altogether. You pass through a series of liaisons that fill your physical needs but not your emotional ones. Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, for all the glamour of their stardom, have a Saturnian romance. Her Venus/Saturn combination is opposite his stellium of Capricorn planets. Though one or both may chaff under the responsibilities of sustaining this relationship, theirs is a difficult tie to break. When Saturn transits the Seventh House of Relationships, you are likely to marry, though not without considerable pre-wedding jitters.
Uranus, the planet of the unexpected, brings relationships out of the blue. If you have a strength Eleventh House or Uranian influence in your chart, you are more susceptible to the charms of these couplings. Exciting and enticing, these liaisons are the ones that make our hearts pound and have us considering formerly unimaginable actions. Your love interest may be unusual, foreign or just plain whacked. Since Uranus is the planet of individuality, these types of relationships have more to do with discovering something about ourselves than hearts and flowers. Though intense, an Uranian relationship rarely lasts past the transit to the planet it triggers. Remember that ... when Uranus makes an impact on your chart and you consider doing things that will blow your life apart.
Neptune is your hearts and flowers romance. Your lover is wonderful, without a flaw. You are so enamored of your heart's desire you barely notice that your lover doesn't notice you. In this relationship, there is an element of deception. Either you are not seeing your lover clearly or your lover is lying to you about something important ... like the fact that your lover is married! If you are a Pisces or have a strong Twelfth House, you are susceptible to Neptunian charms. When you realize that your sweetie has warts, either you act in a mature manner and accept them or you run screaming for the hills.
Pluto is another unlikely candidate in the romance department, but for many people it is a potent force. People with a heavy Scorpio or Eighth House emphasis in their chart often wind up in these types of relationships, though Pluto's transit to your Sun, Moon or Venus can offer up this enticement to you. With Pluto, you are inexplicably drawn to a relationship. The feelings are intense to the point of being overwhelming. You are convinced you have found your one true love and that you are destined to be together forever. The ugly side of this affair is that this type is often about power and control. Plutonian relationships can last up to four years, as the Pluto transits moves off the the trigger planet. If dancing with danger is not your cup of tea, run -- don't walk -- to the nearest exit to avoid the fire! One day, you'll be glad you did.
About the Author
Beth Turnage is a professional astrologer who has twenty years experience counseling clients in career and relationship issues. Currently she writes an astrology column for a weekly newspaper on the Connecticut shoreline and an astrology blog at 451 Press. You can check out the blog at www.astrologyexplored.com.
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posted by Jeffrey Kishner at 4/29/2008
24 Comments:
Jupiter, the beneficent fatso, often brings on romance hot and heavy, with lots of sex and the consequences thereof. Jupiter rules the freewheeling sign of Sagittarius, which loves to love 'em and leave 'em.
Interesting... Relationship with Cappy ex started while Jupiter was conjunct my natal Venus. I got pregnant about 6 months later, while Jupiter was conjunct my Sun/Moon midpoint in my 5th house. Apparently Sun was somewhere near conjoining my natal Moon at that time. My 8th house begins in Sag.
(I have no children, and the relationship is gone, for a while now)
While I'm digging thru that year... He told me he loved me just around transiting Venus conjunct natal Moon, and Mars leaving conjunction with retrograde Uranus... Out of the blue :)
Good post, thanks!
Good info....:-) Thank you Jeffrey, this helped me think of the question I had just asked on the other blog earlier today.
Hey, don't thank me, I just published it. It's by Beth from astrologyexplored.com
great. I have a heavy load of uranus connections in my chart. Nothing lasts. Ever?
Nothing lasts, May. We all turn to dust.
May,
You MAY have more relationships that do not last, but it is possible for anyone to have a long lasting relationship providing you know the traps you can fall into. I have Uranus opposite my Sun, but I've had two marriages, one that lasted ten years and this one sixteen and still going. We all have free will, and we all have the ability to make lemonade out of the lemons handed to us. This is why astrologers are around, to help us do this ;)
Beth
So Jeffrey, So if nothing lasts forever & we all turn to dust, why do we even try?
@shygirl, to enjoy the time we have on earth.
@may, perhaps when Saturn enters your 7th and then opposes your Aries Venus there will be more focus on stability in your love life. In just a few years... Plus many of those Uranus aspects are also Saturn aspects, so Uranus is "tempered."
......to enjoy the time we have on earth.....
WOW !!! I'm having an epiphany here...all these years I kept thinking we were supposed to do something deeper, like find the meaning of life or something...:-) I guess when you think about it, having fun & truly enjoying life for whatever it brings is HARDER than it seems.
@shygirl, I find meaning in doing things that help me to express myself. Sometimes that's work, other times it's play. And I do feel a sense of urgency about it. But it's not a philosophical attitude.
Enjoyment is not in having fun for everyone. Different people enjoy different things ;)
to "obtain a sense of fulfillment"
Pluto is another unlikely candidate in the romance department, but for many people it is a potent force... If dancing with danger is not your cup of tea, run -- don't walk -- to the nearest exit to avoid the fire! One day, you'll be glad you did.
Hi Jeff! I've also found that people with heavy Plutonian romantic influences seem to experience tremendous growth through this kind of entanglement. In fact, during the times when Plutonians opt to play it too safe (out of fear, guilt, or fatigue) they end up with stunted growth elsewhere too, and a whole host of interesting new problems. It's like they become psychologically constipated.
Of course, there's danger and then there's DANGER. The former seems mainly to involve intensity, depth, and unfamiliar territory. Upper-case DANGER is just plain self-destruction or misplaced rage. There's a line, and in my opinion, a Plutonian needs to learn it, by facing and accepting those powerful drives.
Opinion?
You seem conflicted, shy girl. Perhaps you will open up more and see all the great things available to us to enjoy without guilt!
And enjoying doesn't mean indulgence or decadence. Honor, hard earn respect, connections, etc. You find the real meaning for you to enjoy in this life.
I think I may have misrepresented myself with my comment about 'enjoying life', (I cans see that now based on people's response to it). I was coming from a much deeper, spiritual/philosophical perspective, but since I didn't elaborate the context, it seems to have taken a whole different meaning....:-)
"I've also found that people with heavy Plutonian romantic influences seem to experience tremendous growth through this kind of entanglement. In fact, during the times when Plutonians opt to play it too safe (out of fear, guilt, or fatigue) they end up with stunted growth elsewhere too, and a whole host of interesting new problems"
That's an interesting thought, though I personally have yet to meet a client that haven't suffered emotional scars from a Plutonian based relationship. Its like suffering through an addiction, there is some part of you that is broken. You'll heal if you put in the work. but its like a piece of shrapnel, always there.
Now people with a heavy Pluto influence, a Scorpio or someone with a serious Pluto connection to a personal planet, those people are here to experience intensity, but it doesn't have to be a relationship.
Relationships with people who are married, addicted or obsessed are never healthy under any conditions.
I guess we'll have to agree to disagree.
Beth
@Laura F. Walton, I suppose the challenge of a Plutonian is not going too deep into the underworld. A Plutonic relationship can be profoundly healing if you approach it as agent of transformation. However, it can also just be obsessive-compulsive, and you can end up robbed and beaten up in a dingy motel room after having rendezvoused with a prostitute working in a crime ring.
May,it's Karen here-- I have Uranus conjunct my descendant -and while obviously, I have lots of other aspects that may make a difference, I just wanted to tell you that, I've had plenty of unusual relationships, nonetheless last month(April 10th) my husband and I have been together 28 yrs.
So, things can last even if we're influenced by Uranus.:-)
I understood you shygirl.
And exclusion:-)I saw your ;-) but everything fun/enjoyable isn't goofing around.
I understood what Jeffrey was sayingto mean that if we're doing something we find meaningful, that we're passionate about or that gives us that deep feeling of fulfilment or that we just feel real interest in--that *is* fun.
Starrynight,re: Plutonian/dangerous liaisons, I want to sugest something different to you, which is neither agreement nor disagreement but more information.
While I don't advocate relationships with unavailable people either, like you say(married, addicts), I disagree that just like addictions themselves we are simply scarred afterward, even if healed(recovered).
When we begin to recover from an addiction, or return to emotional sobriety after a "Plutonian" dangerous love affair, at first it is just about survival.
Having done both of these myself, more than once, I can tell you that recovery, and then rebuilding has taught me many many lessons.I don't mean only the lesson of "don't go there ever again" ;-)
I mean that I've learned many important lifechanging and spirituality- based "lessons".
No, I don't suggest doing self-destructive things with the excuse or on the chance that we might learn something!
But having been through some real dangerous rides, and been though frustrating, painful, and disastrous love afairs, I eventually learned what I needed to stop *repeating* those patterns. Plus I learned much more about myself, and the nature of people in general.
I am scarred yes.But also stronger and better adjusted.
Karen-Proserpine
Jeff:
thanks for the heads up about my saturn transit! I guess it is only natural for a taurus to have some "stability."
It's absurd though because most of my life isn't like that!! I can't find stability at all!
But it is true, I do have many saturn connections too, I completely forgot about that.
Thanks!
Plutonian relationships. Heaven and hell in the one with 10 times the intensity of a normal relationship. I was burnt to the ground but I've risen like a phoenix from those ashes. When you've lost yourself and almost lost your life and looked that in the eye, there is nothing that anyone can possibly do anymore to scare you. And that my friends is liberation.
Thanks for your perspective, Beth! And I do tend to agree with you about the scars, but as both Karen and Flossy note later: healed scar tissue is stronger than unmarred skin.
By no means am I an advocate of running out and getting into Plutonian situations! As Jeff said, not going too deep into the underworld is the trick, and it's certainly a tricky trick to pull off, especially as a youngster.
In my opinion, one of two things happens to folks who are drawn into these situations. They either don't survive (death is not the only way to "fail to survive" either) or they get better at riding that fine line between the two faces of Pluto. Folks who manage the latter are usually very powerful people...
...for better or worse.
Thanks for the conversation, everyone!
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