Why do Scorpio men stare?
You're at a party, and he's there in the corner, alone, probing you with his deep, intense eyes. It's unnerving. You're either excited by the prospect of being devoured, or freaked out by his stalkerish behavior. You try to distract yourself by talking to a friend, but you feel his energy even when you're not looking in his direction. What's up with that dude? Why does he stare at you?
The Spy Who F****d MeHe's studying you. In two different ways. First, he's undressing you with his eyes. All men do this, but Scorpio is an especially sexual sign, so he'll be absorbing your curves, and if you don't dress to bring attention to your shape, he'll be wondering what's beneath your loose-fitting clothing. Second, he's investigating how you tick. Like any good detective or psychotherapist, Scorpio observes your mannerisms. He notices that you fiddle with your earrings when you're flirting. Or that you run your palms down the side of your thighs a few times when you feel nervous. All your idiosyncracies get filed away in Scorpio's emotional hard drive, so that when he finally interacts with you, he'll know how to work his way into your psyche (or your pants).
Wearing Shades in Daylight
Although staring is far from indirect, there's a "passivity in power" aspect to this behavior. Scorpio's not making any moves on you, and yet he's totally got your attention. Unlike a fire sign like Aries, Leo or Sagittarius, he doesn't do it with enthusiasm or dramatic flair. Rather, it's his focus that does the trick. A Sag will tell a grand story to the whole room, making his audience erupt in laughter, while Scorpio uses laser consciousness to focus solely upon you. And the beauty of it is that no one else notices he's staring!
Scorpio's an expert at hiding. If he didn't want you to know he was looking at you, you'd be oblivious. Perhaps you'd feel that you're being watched, but you wouldn't be able to identify your observer. Therefore, if you see Scorpio staring, it's because he wants you to know that he's interested in you.
Comment below: What do you do? Approach him? Wait for him to come up and talk to you? What if he never does?
First photo by furryscaly, second by Delwin, both under CC license.
Labels: scorpio
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posted by Jeffrey Kishner at 1/23/2008
35 Comments:
I just found this statement from yamazaru in a different post: "The greatest weakness of a Scorpio is that they don't act until fully assured and ready."
I am an aries woman and I can always indentify a scorpio because of that penetrating stare. I never have such a visceral reaction to anything else like I do the "stare." It makes me so nervous that I literally have the fear or flight response, and I have to run away. It feels like I am having a panic attack. lol.. I don't know why...maybe someone can shed some light.
Scoprs or not, no one has ever managed to look at me like that and pass unnoticed.
What do I do, I look back, straight in the eyes with a Monalisa smile, keep my eyes on his long enough so he knows I know, then carelessly continue doing what ever I was doing at that specific moment. Rinse and repeat... :) Mostly I don't initiate contact.
I wish someone would stare at me like that :/
Just to add... it's a game in which I say 'Bring it, I can take you!' :)
Staring at someone just makes them insecure. Period.
(we do this in restaurants when we were bored many years ago as little kids).
I am SO HAPPY this blog is up. I am a scorpio myself and so is my ex, and i;ve learned so much thru this website. I am a dove/eagle and he is a gray lizard. He stares all the time at me, yet has a gf.
"The greatest weakness of a Scorpio is that they don't act until fully assured and ready."
That is so true. U dont wnat to let to much of your guard down. keep thsi great posts coming!
even if i am attracted to such a person i am.... indifferent. maybe bec i have moon in scorpio, maybe for whatever reason, i am empathetic in picking up a sexualized emotionality, intensity, but as gemini sun..there is a weakness. why so direct granny? emotionally i am piqued but intellectually i cant abide. dont kno what is my prob - competition, too egotistic, simultaneous disgust-desire, cold heart ?! anyway.
i can instadetach but may obsess later at being so blabla and bitch, and have tried to rehunt down peeps to do a few observations of my own. hmmm..heinous! its water off a ducks back in the moment but afterwards i drown in it lol
Frankly I quite like it when they stare, if they stare. That certain Matthew McConaughey stare. It's very seductive and I respond in kind. Stare right back.
It's a staring contest of sorts. Someone eventually acquiesces, usually the female. Unless she's giving license to her Mars.
Hypno-Toad is a total Scorpio:
http://youtube.com/watch?v=0_BD_WBg9aA&feature=related
Oh I know that stare!! At parties I always take that stare as permission to use Scorpio as furniture! I have sat in laps of multiple Scorps staring at me, and then proceed to ignore them as I talk to my friends or play games and let them look at me up close to decide on me. The ones that like me end up touching me in little places like my elbows, neck, or in hubby's case, toes(had my shoes off). It FEELS sexual no matter how benign...I get sucked in and spend the rest of the evening with them alone! I feel like I get so much closer with them once we separate from the crowd....
I've had a love/hate relationship with Scorp men my entire adult life. Unfortunately, as sexy as they are, they tend to be duds in bed. At least the ones that I've experienced. They are very sexy, they do have that intense stare that makes you think they'll be wild, then fall short of expectations. If continuing on with him was an option, all I ever managed to find were mind-games, lies, and secrets. And harems. Scorp men are certainly the natural players of the zodiac.
Me: Pisces sun, Libra Moon, Scorp Asc. Mars in Aries, Venus in Pisces. For the record I settled on a Cancer boy who is exactly what I expected those scorpios to be in bed, with none of the mind-games, secrets, and lies.
Oh I know these stares! Talk about bringing out the insecurities. There are times when I just feel like yelling at them WHAT ARE YOU STARING AT!!!!I usually try my hardest to ignore them or sometimes shoot them daggers...it doesn't help. I've also got to say that Aries men do this to me a lot, maybe it's Aries men with Scorpio in their charts?
Hahhaa..I don't know why this made me laugh out loud. It's just true. I tend to attract Scorpios or Scorpio moons, so I can recognize this behavior. Maybe it's the Pisces I have that connects with that emotional depth. I just love it. It's hilarious. I don't know...
By the way, Jeff, do you find that Scorpio men are more intense than the women? I read somewhere that the man always is more intense than the woman of any sign, but there's something mildly sexist about that comment.
Hrmm...
Leo Woman: I could smell his sex, like all of the sudden. He got spartk. and then the staring. Fought off an associate of mine, the likes of whom,I have seen neither hide, nor hair of. That scorpio man intensly drew me into his sex for 10 week. Gosh what a great date. Etheral. Now he is gone. No more mental masterbation either. He envoked that we had unfinished business. I completed my part. He has left his undone. Guess he has moved on.
Leo Woman etc. al., I think the real reason they stare is cause they are full of crap. I think they shake in their little boots at the thought of a puss leading up or down the stairs to some dark den of ?????. That siad I really think, they think, they can constantly check the water and not make a ripple. Children should be seen and not heard. Hows that for a smack on the rump. Good Roggering? I've not not received it yet from that stareer i mean stinger! My bad. Purrrr!!!
@hanitabonita, I would not say that Scorpio men are more intense than Scorpio women. But I've not been sexually involved with a Scorpio male, so I cannot say from personal experience.
Those of you who know my stance on astrology in here: I am visiting cause I miss this place, and I will take a neutral stance that is astro-clean. Please don't kick me out for it...
This post is interesting. I have a MUCH different take than most women on a man staring the way Jeffrey describes.
To me, he has just offered himself up to me as a sacrifice. By staring in such a way, I then know he is interested, and he becomes my own pet-project. I may change my behavior just to throw him off-track, confuse him, or just plain play with the boy. On one hand, I am entertaining him as a way to disctract him while I outrun his cute little mind game and analyze him from around the back door. This is likely to piss him off or arouse him, so I only let him know I am doing this if my analysis causes me to like him. Then I let him know I've been f**king with him too, and his aggressiveness and shock comes out just when I am ready to catch it. Hot.
I did this with my angel. I call it counter-stalking, and he should have been aware that there are female huntresses out there! Silly boy, stalking is for felines.
@Sagilarious, you are welcome here regardless of how astro-clean or -dirty you are.
Wow BIG EYE BALL, me thinks someone is staring at me right including Jeffrey in the corner of the computer page. :-) :-0 I'm a scorp women and hardly ever just star at someone, I have men star at me like right now as I am at the library this guy across from me is just staring away, I know I can look back but then it starts it opens the flud gates when you have that way of influencing a person so I mind my own bees wax unless I'm in the mood for it. For me as a scorp when I star it is more of an analysis of the person sizing them up in a way, for example my gemini guy friend the first time I met him he would not look at my and I found myself intently looking at his hands, how he was holding his file folder and pen with his fingers, arms, hair, how he was sitting, I really like guys hands always checking those out tells you a lot about a person, after that few second sum up of him I was able to read what he was up to that day and quite a bit about his personality. Ms. Difficult
Jeffrey, your attitude and leadership of this blog is the primary reason I missed the place :) You make a nice home here.
Thanks for accepting my heathen self.
For a woman with Venus conjoined Pluto, I'm surprised I haven't been involved with more Scorpios. There was one Scorpio guy I dated who I called the Prince of Darkness. I went to his house just once and it was like a funeral parlor. His name was Ray, so I also like to call him, facetiously, A Drop of Golden Sun. Can't say I recall him staring at me, but maybe that's why it didn't go anywhere.
Leslee don't just leave it at that I'm a Scorp and have to know how in the world did his house look like a funeral parlor was there dead bodies all over, or body parts, did have halloween stuff all over the place bats and skeletons hangning, or did he just have coufins lying around. Ms. Diff
I'm a Scorpio woman and I stare (only if I mean it, not just to freak people out) (OK, sometimes to freak people out, but they have to really earn it).
Anyway... when I stare in a good way, it's because I feel it's more expressive than small talk.
Heh. The Scorpio man's house was *dark*. Dark furniture, dark drapes, no dead bodies but just seemed funereal. Reminded me of a priest's rectory. He had once been in the Catholic seminary, but had decided not to go through with becoming a priest (prolly a good idea).
OMG I think I need to pull out my nebulizer...I seriously almost had an asthma attack from lauging my a** off... and it all started with "The spy who f**ked me." A taurus used to give me those stare, the buggger must have a scorpio rising. At first it scared the living s**t out of me because I was excited, intrigued, and peturbed at the same time but after it started happening to me more often, and since now I've grown more into my womanhood and better understand it, I pull out my venus-pluto conjuction in scorpio and use it to mess with their heads-similiar to what sagilarious does [high five to you!]- "counterstalk" them, drown them under my spell. This taurus has his game downpack though, he's making me work [my venus conjuncts his pluto so its taking alot of my willpower] but that only adds more intrigue. We both agree that once we get a hold of each other [i'll probably give in] fire is gonna consume us.
Usually I stare if a woman is beautiful or alluring in some way which catches my attention.
wow..i wish i didnt have so much scorpio energy. Its intense knowing someones deepest secrets even when you first meet them. Its like a burden most of the time. Also all my other planets are in sagittarius or libra so they dont like that scorpio depth.
Greetings to the house–it’s good to drop by once again.
Shall we?
The guy up there making like a Roy Batty wannabe in the opening frames of Blade Runner actually looks like his girlfriend’s cat is making biscuits on his lap, and just sank a claw into his boys—that special male moment just prior to a hoarse cry of recognition.
With Scorp rising and Sun and Venus conjunct in the first house, not far from the ascendant, it’s rare for me to *stare* at someone unless I’m watching out of curiosity; as in, zero predatory intent. I don’t care for that approach. It seems more macho than machismo, and anyone who knows the tango understands exactly what I mean.
There’s no need to stare, and I’ve no interest. If I want her to know that she has my attention, believe me, a one-second glance is plenty. If she’s someone who *sustains* my attention, she’s likely astute enough to read the follow-up in my body, how I move my hands, the way I smile. The warmth.
I’m drawn to subtlety and understatement, and appreciate those qualities at the heart of a woman. And, if she’s Gemini with a little Crab and Bull in the mix—but that’s another matter.
By no means does the above preclude a steamy encounter in a crowded, bawdy setting, hot tunes from the booth, mirror ball spinning, drinks and laughter all around. But, even then, why stare? If she’s unaware of my aura and I can’t catch her eye, I’ll take a chance, make an excuse to get close, whisper in her ear, or write a question mark on her palm with my finger. And smile.
I know this puts me at odds with those more inclined to see courtship as counting coup, a variation of war between the sexes where one takes pride in personal weaponry, emotional scars justifying cynicism, a jaundiced eye toward flowers, style, and chivalry.
So?
This is not to say that I won’t summon that power if circumstances warrant. There’s no question but that it’s eloquent and energy-efficient if someone’s in my face and I want to make absolutely clear: have you thought this through? There’s the line. Cross it at your peril.
But those moments are rare. If there’s a choice, I’ll walk away.
And so it goes.
Nos vemos.
Damn those Egyptian heiroglyphics!
’t’s’t’t~!!!
Everytime someone posts something especially brilliant after devising it in MS Word, it breaks out in these ’t’s pimples and becomes difficult to decipher without slowing down the pace significantly.
The only way around it, is to click on "post comment" and read it in the left-hand side bar, the original clean version.
(sigh)
Anyway Mr. Novemos whoever you are, that was a good comment. I read it, slowly. The heiroglyphics put the brakes on my skimming through at lightening speed, as I'm prone to missing important details at times ;)
He says up there, "But, even then, why stare? If she’s unaware of my aura and I can’t catch her eye, I’ll take a chance, make an excuse to get close, whisper in her ear, or write a question mark on her palm with my finger. And smile."
Wow. Where did you come from. That'll get you laid real good, every time. Smooth operator ;)
Remind me to stay at arm's length from you at the club. I need to retain my chastity (har har)
Thank you site administrator for fixing the Egyptian heiroglyphic dilemna!
What happened? I spoke too soon. The Egyptian heiroglyphics have returned with a VENGEANCE!
Mercury Rx is a bummer.
I really resonated with the Scorpio stare. I am interested in a Scorpio and just two days ago we were both at a party and I could feel his eyes on me but I would not acknowledge his stares. I don't know if he likes me or not, but I played up to the staring! You're right, no-one else seemed to notice him staring. Sneaky Scorpios. Shame I am a Gemini, as we have some pretty good chemistry and have very similar outlook on life and then i see a whole section about Gem & Sco breakups!! Help!
MY SCORPIO MAN 15 YEARS MY SENIOR, DON'T WORRY I'M GROWN 40-ISH. THIS WAS THE TOUGHEST CHALLENGE OF LOVE I'VE EVER FACED WITH THIS GUY! OH MY GOD. I'M A CAPRICORN WOMAN AND I MEAN BUSINESS ABOUT MY LIFE & LOVE. I HAD TO GIVE UP SOME OF MY OWN POWER TO LET THIS RELATIONSHIP WORK, YOU WILL NEVER OUT-DO A SCORPIO MAN. I WAS UN-SURE SOMETIMES WITH HIM BECAUSE HE SAYS SOME OF THE MOST OF THE WALL STUFF' AT TIMES MY FEELINGS WOULD BE HURT 'SAMPLE' ONCE WE WERE TOGATHER JUST US TO AND I HAD SEEN HIM A FEW DAYS 'BOTH OF OUR WORK SCEDULES WERE BUSY' ANY I ASK HIM DID KNOW FOR SURE IF HE REALLY WANTED TO BE WITH ME? GIVE YOU WEVE BEEN TOGATHER FOR 18 MONTHS NOW'. 'AND HIS REPLY WAS QUOTE AND UN QUOTE I DON'T KNOW. THE COMMENT SADDEN ME AND HE APOLOGIZE FOR MAKING THAT COMMENT AND STARTED TO KISS MY FORE HEAD SO I FELT HE WAS SORRY. I NOW KNOW HE LOVES ME CAUSE HE DOES THE THINGS THAT A MAN SUPPOSE TO DO WHEN HE LOVES HIS WIFE/ WOMAN, HE CALLS. HIS STARE IS WHAT STARTED THIS THING WITH HIM W/ME. HE'S HANDSOME, HE WORKS OUT EVERY-DAY KID U NOT. HE'S PICKY ABOUT WHAT HE EATS AND TRYS TO DO ME THE SAME WAY, NOT. HE'S A CHARMER I AM JUST SOPPED UP ON A BISCUIT WITH SYRUP. I FEEL SO GOOD WHEN I'M WITH HIM IN LOVE. I DID'NT NEED HIM TO COMPLETE MY LIFE, OR GIVE UP THE THINGS HE LOVES TO DO, PLAY SHOWS WITH HIS BAND, GO TO THE GYM EVERY DAY, RIDING HIS MOTOR CYCLE AND HANGING OUT WITH FRIENDS. I'M ALREADY COMPLETE, FUN,LOVING, AMBIOUS, GIVING, AND VERY PATIENT. MY LIFE IS FULL BUT I LET HIM KNOW I HAD TO FIT HIM IN AND WAS HE DOWN? TOOK ME 16 MONTHS TO GET AN ANSWERS AND I GOT IT AND BABY MY HANDS ARE FULL IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN. A LOVE THAT MAKES MY SOUL MUCH HAPPIER!
OMG!!! This is sooooo true!!! lol I like this about them but not a big fan of them.
Scorpios are indeed sweethearts when they are nice so play nice, scorpians =)
happygoluckyaquariangirl
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